Happy new year! I’ll keep it brief, what with the online filing deadline being imminent.

The Revenue has issued the ten most “bizarre, exotic and flimsy” excuses made by taxpayers for submitting late returns – which I present without comment, except to say argument number two is clearly the most compelling.

1. My pet goldfish died.
2. I had a run-in with a cow.
3. After seeing a volcanic eruption on the news, I couldn’t concentrate on anything else.
4. My wife won’t give me my mail.
5. My husband told me the deadline was 31 March, and I believed him.
6. I’ve been far too busy touring the country with my one-man play.
7. My bad back means I can’t go upstairs. That’s where my tax return is.
8. I’ve been cruising round the world in my yacht, and only picking up post when I’m on dry land.
9. Our business doesn’t really do anything.
10. I’ve been too busy submitting my clients’ tax returns.

P.S. None of the above were successful. See the comments below.

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