Working Together: VAT helpline

On top of the three phone calls mentioned above, I’ve phoned at 09.35, 09.50, 10.00, 10.15, 11.00, 11.30, 12.15, 12.30 and 13:35 only to listen to the same message.
 

I have had the same experience with the line being so busy that you are simply told to call again later - hence you just can't shift some work off your desk in an efficient manner.

my current frustration has been in authorising my agency to submit VAT returns online for a particular 'new' client. I already submit about 10 clients' vat returns online, and have therefore used the service effectively several times. i am now trying to authorise a new client, who has traded and been vat regd for many years, and for whom we have registered as agents online last year - hence for SA purposes HMRC will speak to us. I have the 5 necessary pieces of information to authorise me for vat online, and I know they are correct, since I have a copy of the latest VAT return submitted, and a copy of the VAT regn certificate. Unfortunatley, the HMRC computer system doesn't match them (???!!!). When I try to resolve this issue with the VAT helpline, I am told that since I am not authorised, they cannot spk to me. They cannot even allow me to tell them what I am inputting, so they can know that all the details are accurate, and see what else might be the problem. I must go back to the client, (who thinks that I am already the authorised agent, as he has given me the authorisation code I organised months ago), and he must telephone the helpline to ensure all the details are correct. He must therefore waste his time trying to get through on the helpline, and when he does get through, despite my attempts to explain the purpose of the call, he simply says that they tell him to tell me that I am the one who must register online!! I go back to the helpline, not best pleased, and rant about this unacceptable situation. They then tell me that my client can authorise me to have a one-off telephone call, by calling back the helpline, and asking them for a reference, which he then gives to me. Some days later, i am finally in possession of the precious reference, and call back the helpine. They now confirm that I have all the correct details, but before they can refer the case to a technician, I must go back to the client again, and check with them whether anyone else may already have set up VAT online for their VAT number, in which case it must be formally withdrawn before my request will be accepted! I ask them, surely, you can just have a look can't you? ....... I know this cannot be the case, since the longstanding book-keeper, who is a mature gentleman, has been doing the VAT manually for as long as he can remember! I have finally managed to get agreement for a call-back from a technician, which I am still waiting for. Yesterday, I attempted online VAT authorisation for another existing client, again with all of the relevant information to hand in the form of copy documents. Needless to say, I am not looking forward to a repetition of all of the above.

I have had a similar experience with SA authorisation, but at least with that helpline, they eventually put me through to a technician, (who resolved the 'technical problem' from their end), without quite so much fuss. With the requirement to submit VAT returns online looming, I am aghast that the measures in place to safeguard privacy of information, have become so rigidly extreme to the point of being ridiculous, not to mention inconsistent between the SA and VAT arms of the same HMRC organisation.